Shop Truths, Phrases, Tales; and Outright Lies

[Frank S]

If you can haul it you can have it LOL. That is exactly how a company that I owned 10% of acquired a 25,000 lb Taylor forklift Another company had this old huge Taylor forklift just sitting in a corner of their shop it had been years since it had been moved all they wanted was to have it gone. I took a couple of guys with me in my welding rig we jacked it up to allow the beads on the tires to be free then fired up my compressor, got the tires aired up the drive tires were 5 ft tall and 2 ft wide so imagine the size of this thing, it had an extra counter weight welded on the main counter weight the add on was 6 inches thick by 4 ft tall and nearly 4 ft wide. The batteries were dead so I used my 400 amp Hobart diesel welder to jump start it poured 10 gallons of diesel in it, once it started my guys said how are we going to haul it the 40 miles to the shop. I said we're not I'm going to drive it and one of you guys are going to drive my truck. neither of them thought they could drive my truck since it had a 10 speed + a 2 speed transmission I said look it is just like driving a pickup with a 4 speed besides we are only going to be traveling about 10 MPH so you will not have to get out of 4th gear you won't even have to shift it you can start off in 4th if you have to an hour later we had it home. Handiest forklift you could ever imagine Unload whole trailer loads of steel in 2 picks.
I like those you can have it if you can move it things

[Frank S]

this is the drill press that Tm51 told me about
it is just barely smaller than the one my wife liked so much
this one has a 12 inch column her's had a 13 inch also her's we call it her's because she went nuclear when someone used it and didn't clean it off afterwards.had a table mounted to the column instead of the block sitting on the base the arm was fixed height at the top of the column.

[C-Bag]

"I like those you can have it if you can move it things"

I'll bet you do. It's in keeping with your tag line. Not many have equipment or the storage you do.

So did you hide that drill from your wife?

[Frank S]

No I showed the pictures to her.Her first words were when do we leave then I told her we could go get it but it will wreck our budget then if an emergency came up we would have to tap into other moneys the tap into other moneys statement was all it took because she knows how nearly improbable it is that other moneys get returned because she knows what is is taking to recover from our move after tapping way too deeply into the other moneys department.
but if it is still there a month from now I see a road trip on the horizon

[Toolmaker51]

....it was one of those things if you could haul it, you could have it. It was behind a huge building and who knows how big it was.

Depends on how gol' durn ding dang big the building was....

click on the pic pals, but stand back
Sure can't hide it from the wife.....but YOU can successfully hide FROM the wife.
Or hide wife, if you're into that kind of thing.

Speaking of not so diminutive capital equipment
This WAS largest planer in 1908; Bement-Niles (typo I believe s/b Niles-Bennett-Pond).I am certain this not much larger than planer mill at 'our' Long Beach Shipyard, 30 years later, also Niles. Could be very close. Planers by nature, require out-of-proportionately larger footprint and height than other machines; typical of equipment with full length ways, surface grinders, jig-bores, jig-mills. So beside finished size, imagine scale of work to build it. Casting patterns, iron billets, gear cutting, a couple hundred square feet scraping ways and table, cranes, fasteners...and surely received putty and paint.
http://www.machineryscans.com/big%20planer.htm

[Frank S]

I will not let the wife see that picture

[Frank S]

there is a recycle/ scrap yard in Ft Worth that often gets machines in there, the guy who owns the place flat out refuses to break up any machine that might be possibly put back in service. even if only parts of the machine comes in they get put over in an area set aside for machinery I stopped by there once and he had 6 horribly abused old lathes huge chunks knocked out of their ways cracked head stocks missing carriages no tail stocks you get the picture and 1 radial drill press body sans drilling head 18" column at least 10 ft tall the arm was broken off at about 4 maybe 5 ft out, huge 4 ft wide by 8 ft long base about a ft tall with 1" T slots of course he has them priced by the ton I asked him about them. He said there is always someone who will buy them who needs parts or just wants to try and rebuild them.
This was about 3 1/2 years ago I've been in there several times since and they were all gone other machines were in their place but much better condition
he even had a couple under power those weren't priced by the ton.

[Toolmaker51]

As some know, I've been on the job market a few weeks. Indiscriminate recruiters I call pirates, completely dissolve well-edited resumes, and pilfer contact info. I drilled straight into a supervisor at just such an agency in NY Friday afternoon; imagine her surprise 'hot-stamp operator' wasn't a position of interest. Another nicomguano without any kind of manufacturing vocabulary.........to her 'machine' & 'machines' were all the same thing, verb, noun, adverb or adjective. Along with her comprehension issues, this isn't exactly a job rife with skills; just 'Abilities'.
Here's a copy/ paste of the main requisite skills. It reads OK except for one glaring what-the-he**?
"Skills;
Ability to plan work and select proper tools • Ability to compare and accurately determine difference in size, shape, and form of objects • Ability to apply shop mathematics to solve problems • Ability to set-up machines • Ability to correctly and safely use hand tools (both manual and pneumatic) • Ability to read a tape measure in metric and empirical standards • Ability to read effectively from a paper copy • Ability to work within precise limits and/or standards of accuracy • Ability to multi-task • Ability to work well with others • Ability to work in a fast paced environment • Ability to communicate effectively • Ability to follow and understand directions."

This was supplied to her by another department. What do extra layers cost that should take one? Discovered root to less unemployment; more doing less.

[Frank S]

Skills? "Ability to plan work and select proper tools • Ability to compare and accurately determine difference in size, shape, and form of objects • Ability to apply shop mathematics to solve problems • Ability to set-up machines • Ability to correctly and safely use hand tools (both manual and pneumatic) • Ability to read a tape measure in metric and empirical standards • Ability to read effectively from a paper copy • Ability to work within precise limits and/or standards of accuracy • Ability to multi-task • Ability to work well with others • Ability to work in a fast paced environment • Ability to communicate effectively • Ability to follow and understand directions."
This might have been similar to an add that I would have placed in a classifieds when seeking temp or possibly an apprentice's helpers.
Now had I been seeking a welder I might have specified Welder wanted must be familiar with AWS D1.1 able to pass WQTP#2 in 3 & 4 g in both SMAW and GMAW on ASTM A514 or some similar qualification depending on the project at hand.
That is a skill requisite driven ad.

[Toolmaker51]

And since we've not given poor concepts sufficient thrashing of late; here's a corker.

http://time.com/4723114/50-worst-cars-of-all-time/

I think actual Time Magazine article, author Pulitzer Prize winner Dan Neil, was 2007, but can't seem to find a fully illustrated link. If you do, relay it to me and I'll edit this post.
I swear, most hilarious descriptions of product ever read.