Artisanal firewood spoof - video

[mklotz]

For some reason, paintings by an animal that isn't even aware it's painting reminds me of Jackson Pollock in his drip period. If you're unfamiliar with drip painting, this so-called art lesson...

https://www.khanacademy.org/humaniti...hnique-pollock

will teach you more than you probably want to know.

To put this all in perspective, a recently discovered painting suspected to be an original Pollock drip, is expected to sell in the $10-15 million range if it's proved to be authentic. It would be worth a lot less if painted by an animal although then it might be more artistic, whatever that means.

[Frank S]

an animal painted painting could absolutely be more artistic than one done by Pollock. Dogs are supposed to have a very limited color recognition some breeds may have a little better than others but I once saw a Huge great Pyrenees at a carnival wearing painting booties walk on 3 legs holding up 1 paw then go over to a canvas it was painting? sit on it's haunches then smear some paint in 1 direction then another then place its paw in another color smear that then keep selecting other colors. eventually it had painted could be loosely called a the dog and the tree although it required a stretch of one imagination.
TRAINED to do this? if so how? Plus how could it tell which colors as it appeared to randomly selecting them returning to places it had missed to add more of the same color it had previously applied. A neighbor owns a Pyre he has had it for several years and says as a pup while he was trying to train it that it was the most stubborn animal he has ever owned but one of the best heard dogs he has. his kids used to ride it when they were very young
I think that a Chimpanzee might actually be aware of what it were painting if one was trained to do so.
But some humans having the awareness of what they are doing while splashing, dripping, smearing, or dumping paint on a canvas may be questionable

[Jon]

Elephants riding tricycles. Sad.

[mklotz]

Do that kind of crap enough and you end up with this...

[Frank S]

looks like little regard for the Elephant's shoulder joints was considered in the design of those trikes. Notice the unnatural width the front feet are apart. That has to be uncomfortable for the beast
When elephants walk they do not normally raise their feet very high off the ground

[Jon]

Possibly a more ethical strategy. Not exactly sure what we have here (wacky Japanese game show?), but apparently this GIF demonstrates a method for gathering terrifying up-close grizzly bear photos:

[Jon]

[Frank S]

And I'm sure someone will buy one but what the heck is clam beach sand and why would you be concerned if it were GMO, gluten and sodium free? are they planning on eating them?

[Walkman]

Well, now you can find out what they do with the scraps and cutoffs.

[Frank S]

Well, now you can find out what they do with the scraps and cutoffs.

OK! I guess I've been doing it all wrong with the 2 cords of fire wood I cut each year to burn. Instead of burning it in my wood stove I should be rubbing it with ginger root and wiping it down sanding off the roughness and using nose hair scissors to trim off the stray fibers before I burn it. maybe I need to use organic vegetable oil for bar oil so I don't infect the grain structure with that nasty old fossil oil to protect the environment. also I should only use my electric chainsaw in the woods by running 2000 feet of extension cord
Yeah right.