Shop Truths, Phrases, Tales; and Outright Lies

[Toolmaker51]

Ok, a bit too intricate to be descriptive, brief and accurate. Fun part's easy. 3 characters "Who" and names changed to protect a brace of morons. 'Moron', charitable phrase that. Henceforth, ID'ed as (dufus) d1 and d2. Forget the brief part, efficiency kills fun. Short story anyway, compared to War and Peace.

Set Up
Day 1 last Wed. Over time, d2 frequently mentions "25 years in production". Checking LinkedIn, there is a short USMC commission and production turns out to be printing industry. Not offset like circulars, cartography or even texts. Checkbooks. Oh yeah that relates, dovetails right into metal fab. Most initiatives turn out to be theorizing, weak attempts to apply single station and closed cell work to multi-process manufacturing.
Now it's 2:30 and clocked out. d2 is assisting press brake operator. His sale of fairing sheets is late. They are 16ga galvanized, 109" wide 70" something deep, no way 1 man job. Interesting part, one end angles 30 degrees from other, but not a simple crease. A 12" radius, needs like 50 fractional step bends. The inspector, Mr. Who stops by off the clock, but to support the brake operator, a good kid. They are having trouble, middle is buckled; bet extreme ends of ram are hitting before the middle. After signal to brake-op "I won't buy (sign off) these." d2 says "...we're having trouble." Magic 9 items need to ship, swear that .75 hour is quote for ALL 9, after 1/2 hour setup. Started in the morning and now 8 hours in. They frequently video the brake-op, surprisingly no camera and tripod in sight for this. Who fires 16" Naval battery. "Told ya, this looks easy from a swivel chair, watching youtube." Direct hit, d2 is shocked, can't respond with anything but 'you knucklehead 25 years yaddy yaddy ya.' Who chuckles and returns "25? what percentage is that compared to the total out here?...got 26 driving you jarheads around AND 40 years producing, not watching." Who departs without any evasive maneuver.

Heat's ON
Day 2, Thursday. HOT job. Co. sells bundle of weldments, 1.75 od cold rolled 37" long w/ a forged double pin clevis each end. Rods weren't chamfered night before, to run next morn. Guess Who got that deal. Rumor has it he's Inspector and mystery machinist. Nuthin beats switching 12'' chuck to 3 jaw by hand, mount steady rest cuz bar's bigger than spindle bore. No clue, fairly kickazz 60's era Okuma D1-6 spindle isn't 2 1/16 id. Anyhoo#1, Guess Who guy loads 58 bars, cranking the compound, flipping to other end and filling a pallet. Robot operator grabs a couple, fires up and he's off to the races. They're 25#, handled 3x is 4350. Runs bulk of order, we clock out, 2nd comes in.

Enfilade & Defilade
Day 3, Friday. 1st comes in 0600, job's incomplete. Shut down for porosity on 2nd's start up (oh sure - ran fine all day). 9 bad parts. We never run out of gas, silo sized vessel outside. Cracked nozzle supposedly (likely the prevalent & cracked supv.) So, intrepid G. Who gets his fav'rit flash ''...you need to cut off welds re-chamfer bars AND reshape spud of said clevises, all 18 of course. "How long's it gonna take". "Dunno, only heard of it 35 seconds ago" "Well get them done fast as possible" "No" "This isn't a race, it's to save a salesman (dufus2) and he isn't going to make a hospital visit, this ain't kid stuff". Way unappreciative glare from dufus1.

D-Day
Of course G. Who knew. They (Co.) shy away from setup parts, 'specially when customer supplied materials are used. He split a few last run awhile back, recovering all destined to be scrapped out. Drawer of tool box has many accommodations, no one else can tell what they are. Snarling glance dufus1 grabs one clevis to give it a try. Oh, he'll show me, er G. Who. Despite all the 5s initiatives, 80 grit belts for the big sanders aren't replaced until last one burns up. 5s apparently means swearing, usually the colloquial term for feces, that many times. d1 goes at it, dinky right angle pneumatic in one hand, clevis in da utter. Like a weak 4th of July, way less spectators. d1 stops, clamps forging in his metal forming brake. His go-to repair site, that and fat deadblow hammer; zero talent past that. Knowledgeable set knows it as a Wilton Bullet vise. A veritable sculptor, he carves toward the spud with all the might 1/4" HF pneumatic RA can muster. The spud tapers from maybe an inch to 5/8'' or so and quite short, a well hidden nipple under mile of MIG wire. The bar, weld and cover passes near 2'' od. Audience is dufus2; hands in pockets, leaning forward oddly, intent behind 'cool' safety glasses, jeans, red poly-knit shirt, diagonal stripe on left sleeve. Grinding feverishly and trading off, they'll be awhile. Too dirty for ROFLOL, Who-man makes intermittent observations, appraising the competition, for plenty oneupmanship ammo.

Operation Flank and T-Bone
Meanwhile, Mr. Who spins last 2 bars. Swaps out 3 to 4 jaw, pulls steady rest, backs tailstock far as it goes and rolls up sleeves. Cue up something like a loping radial aircraft engine. Or 4, 113 inch HD's and a BSA 441. Anyhoo #2. He's got 2 pads that bridge gap of clevis arms and a little jackscrew inside. No indicator, just circular scored lines on chuck face; he's got the nerve and he's got the touch. Love that line, no clue on origin. Open those imaginary throttles. The setup is RIGID, goes 735 rpm, next step is 1200 something, inappropriate for this can't handfeed quick or deep enough to pass workhardening. Big negative triangular insert eats up crap weld fine, right near original form. He pulls the part and strolls toward robot station to verify Ok or better. Ahead of d1 by 5 feet, holding his out like a champagne toast - hot champagne at that. G. Who, eveready to convert defense to offense asks polite-like and impossibly straightfaced "First one?".
Evidently practice pays, now the glare is b-grade horror movie quality.
Most abruptly, sanding comes to a grinding halt. "Just get em done". d1 and d2 stomp off, with pinhole burns in shirts.
Returning to lathe Who starts in on remaining 16. Part way through, d2 hies in for another " how soon?". wtf its barely 10am. Who gets off more 2 rounds. "...faster than you'll figure out how to do this" and "too bad about the shirt dude, whats the racing stripe for?" a curt "...only decoration." Instantaneously and between the eyes "Good, lets time how fast you go away." Who is energized to say the least, heat of competition as it were.


Deguello
Now it's 11; still doing in-process inspections as they come along, back & forth from lathe to surface plate. Who finishes during lunch, plotting next sortie all along. But now, Who knows the cell numbers to d1 and d2. Texts out "Done. Avg less than 5 minutes part to part. Pay attention to your elders. You owe me lunch and and apology."
Who learns later d2 goes to welder asking "what's this is all about?" Welder really has NO interest in d2's number, and so states. They don't get along either. That is related to Who, and he texts out "Only one here with a Los Angeles area code, your fav'rit knucklehead, why blame [welder]".
Finally, Who logs in to job tracking, claims 9 bars, and 17 clevi. Comments section records permanently. "Saw cut weldments, 18 ends. Chamfer bars, both ends. Recut 17 clevis forgings. Someone thought hand grinding would beat 10 HP lathe and me."

Debrief
Believe it, me doing the Alpha-Hotel bit is not normal. AH's are amateurish, baseless, and without sufficient where-with-all to convince experienced persons of their false sincerity. After years seeing work dissolve into near servitude, where administrators think term papers equate work experience, and offsite corporate decisions solve everything, I bucked. Somehow, sometime, and thankfully individuality fell on me and it has a degree of self-preservation. They have little self-assurance, outside a canned title.
Be Right. Stay out of the corner, raise voice but don't yell, mild indirect swearing and use their ineptness to advantage. Never been terminated in any manner, genuine or created, or even on the carpet. It would be interesting to present facts against those abrasive and inflated egos to a third party. Somehow it never comes to that, despite veiled threats. The loudest and loutish are the trolls, without tangible means to establish themselves.

[PJs]

As an amateur philologist TM51, I find this reminding me of the "Allegory of Piers Plowman" which I read again recently. So many similes in the function of the allegory, I had to giggle out loud in filial philology to your fine naming conventions and style. I am however a bit confused as to whether you mean Bugle Call or throat slitting with the term "Deguello"...or both?

I also enjoy learning hysteria (History) and IIRC the "Peasant Wars" started just after Langland's publishing of his landmark works. Did D1, D2 and Guess Who, just pick themselves up and continue to muddle on or did a war break out?

Funny how tragedy is usually comical! ~PJ

FYI
Passus 4

"Whoso wilneth hire to wyve, For welthe of hire goodes--
But he be knowe for a cokewold, kut of my nose!'
Mede mornede tho, and made hevy chere,
For the mooste commune of that court called hire an hore.
Ac a sisour and a somonour sued hire faste,
And a sherreves clerk bisherewed al the route:
" For ofte have I,' quod he, 'holpen yow at the barre,
And yet yeve ye me nevere the worth of a risshe!'
The Kyng callede Conseience and afterward Reson,
And recordede that Reson hadde rightfully shewed ;
And modiliche upon Mede with myght the Kyng loked,
And gan wexe wroth with Lawe, for Mede almoost hadde shent it,
And seide, -Thorugh youre lawe, as I leve, I lese manye chetes;
Mede overmaistreth Lawe and muche truthe letteth.
Ac Reson shal rekene with yow, if I regne any while, -
And deme yow, bi this day, as ye han deserved.
Mede shal noght maynprise yow, by the Marie of hevene!
I wole have leaute in lawe, and lete be al youre jangling,
And as moost folk witnesseth wel, Wrong shal be demed.'
Quod Conscience to the Kyng, 'But the commune wole assente,-
It is ful hard, by myn heed, herto to brynge it,
[And] alle youre lige leodes to lede thus evene.'
"By Hym that raughte on the Rood!' quod Reson to the Kynge,
But if I rule thus youre reaume, rende out my guttes--
If ye bidden buxomnesse be of myn assent.'
"And I assente,' seith the Kyng, " by Seinte Marie my lady,
Be my Counseil comen of clerkes and of erles.
Ac redily, Reson, thow shalt noght ride hennes;
For as longe as I lyve, lete thee I nelle.'
'I am al redy.' quod Reson, "to reste with yow evere;
So Conscience be of oure counceil, I kepe no bettre.'
"And I graunte,' quod the Kyng, "Goddes forbode he faile!
Als longe as oure lyf lasteth, lyve we togideres!'

[Toolmaker51]

Well Deguello connotes a serious outcome. "No quarter" is sufficiently graphic. Santa Ana marched on The Alamo to it.
But on the other hand, it's the name to a ZZ Top album too...

[PJs]

Ah the picture is coming to mind...But of Course! I forgot ZZ the Carnegie wizards of Rock and Roll...a whole 'nother cogitation of Deguello!

[Toolmaker51]

Did D1, D2 and Guess Who, just pick themselves up and continue to muddle on or did a war break out?
Funny how tragedy is usually comical!
In this case, tragedy is how certain ridiculous persons keep themselves employed. d2, Mr. 25 years has not uttered word, nor cast sidewards glance since. Kind of "I tried to catch my eye, but looked the other way."
How 25 yrs qualifies as an argument escapes me; not seeking expertise of others part of that, continually; we'd be but a self proclaimed expert. Invalid, self absorbed, and not even well-rounded.
d1, my 'manager' who has but a single person who reports to him, also is stand-off-ish, thankfully. He smokes outside but wants to hover, looking over my shoulder offering 'tips' & 101 level recommendations. A Quality manager does not know sine bars? Worst sort of desk jockey; he tours vendors and suppliers occasionally and keeps a trip record, logically kept in vehicle and covered clipboard. Then, instead of scanning that, he retypes (barely past hunt-peck rate) digital version, saves and pastes into email for reimbursement. But can't envision providing a laptop - I use my own - to record inspection measurements. I write excel's with speech to text, quite nifty. 1.001 diameter enter- length 2.531 enter - thread pitch 16 enter then id the features on a drawing numerically. Very best when head is inside comparator curtain operating axis controls, avoids readjusting eyes light to dark. Just cuz I'm old doesn't mean stuck in 'my' ways. 63 and look younger than most there.

[Frank S]

Many years ago I was accosted by one of those MR 25's only he was a MR 39 having performed the same task in a production atmosphere since his hiring at the company. I was fresh out of a short 6 year stint in the Military where there was very little call for my very specialized primary function hence I carried and worked in multiple MOS' ( Military occupational specialties) including mechanic/ combat engineer/ machinist/ welder/ truck driver/ weapons specialist, to name a few.
Any way MR 39 would constantly hover near my work station where I was fitting up prototype machine platforms for deep foundation and bridge piling drill rigs, requiring that I often times ignore the draftsmen's drawings and ad-lib my own designs to make things fit or function. MR 39 who had only done 1 single task in the company for 39 years just could not accept this young 25 something year old kid having the knowledge to do intricate work arounds. So one day I was having a particularly in challenging fit up work around. Here comes MR 39 with his less than needed advice, I decided that this would be the day that I either would be made foreman over the entire department or collect any due severance pay.
Right in front of the owner of the company I bulled to the max.
Look I said you say you have 39 years experience when in reality you have only at most 90 days experience and have spent the past 39 years trying to make sure you still know how to preform that same task.
I on the other hand apprenticed for 5 years doing 100s of far more demanding jobs tahn yours prior to joining the military to further my d hone my education an hone my skill set I may have only been with this company a short time but guees who has had not less than 5 significant pay hikes in my short 1 year with the company? My 6 year old daughter could do what you do here if she were only about a foot taller and probably my 2 year old could providing someone would place it on her high chair, either go away and let me do my work or grab that stinger and tack these parts where they need to be.
The next day he was retired from the company. And NO I did not accept the foreman's job a month later I moved on to start my own welding and fabrication business. I have only had 1 possibly 2 short lived jobs since where I actually had to punch a time clock so to speak.
Your Mr 25 sounds like my MR 39

[C-Bag]

I circle this thread like a cat on a hot tin roof. These stories are reflections of my PTSD ( being exposed to bad management, horrible unsafe and dangerous conditions ) of my history of working. It points directly why I tended towards one man shops(just me and the boss) and was never happy or able to hang with family businesses, dealerships and working for large corporations. The more people involved (especially middle management/lead men/family members ) the more the setup to not really do the job at hand and be thwarted at every turn.

These seem to be universal experiences but why oh why does it seem to also be the universal notion that we need more businessmen in leadership positions throughout every level of our lives?

I go through periods where I pay attention and feel like the guy strapped to the couch with his eyes clamped open with the chaos and sheer stupidity of the human condition pouring in, unable to fix or do anything about it. I have to kick the portal closed ,pick myself up off the floor and retreat into doing and making where I can bring creativity to bear and actually solve a problem. The news diet and accomplishing creatively is the only thing that gets my feet on the ground again and focused on the present. And the realization the most soul sucking part for me of my time in the wage slave trenches was being forced to do substandard work because of time limits and or cost.

Everybody knows the "why is there always time to do it over, but never to do it right the first time?" We tried to put that up on the walls with other stupid stuff management put up but it somehow always disappeared.

The truth is when I look back very few of my bosses were creative, that's what I was there for. But having not that great of self esteem I let them nit pick me and actually feel bad about it. Even though when they wanted something done perfect, I was the guy they went to. But I wasn't able to see that at the time, only the little niggling doubts they planted with criticism.

One of the many benefits of working at home is I listen to audio books as I go about more menial tasks. Everything from sci-fi to self help, history, biographies and everything in between. Keeps the old noggin' engaged while my hands are on auto pilot. One of my more interesting one recently was A First Rate Madness: Uncovering The Link Between Leadership and Mental Illness".

Contrary to what you might think, this is about great generals and presidents, NOT guys like Who, d1,d2 and my old nemeses. It shows how there are all shades of supposed mental illness and how the creative mind is more prone to varying kinds and levels of what if taken to extreme seen as mental illness. But in mild forms of like OCD, etc can make somebody compulsively meticulous or be able to come up with solutions a "normal" person could never even comprehend. Because their minds are more agile, less one track, where a normal person( a term called a homoclite) does not have the capacity for. While the book is fascinating to me showing some of the underlying problems the great figures like Sherman, Grant, Ghandi, FDR, JFK etc, went through with their physical and mental illnesses, the equally enlightening is the dissection of the homoclite mind. I'll be honest it reveals more about my old bosses as they were mostly homoclite.

In a nutshell, the homoclite is THE best when in normal stable times where his opposite is not. But under crisis the opposite is true. The homoclite in a crisis situation tends to be the proverbial deer in the headlights, more likely to double down than to find a creative solution. Sound familiar? jes sayin'

[PJs]

Well Said, C-Bag! I re-read this entire thread again this morning and thought of a couple of things.

First is; I wonder if I resemble MR25...that little niggler tells me I probably did once or twice along the many miles.

Second is; there are a lot of people out there and every one has their own "Way of Becoming". I generally don't like the idea of Archetypes but age has shown me there is some truth to it, even though I Know each of us has our own unique character based on many factors. The key is how does one make do in the sea of them...and why? Here is my attempt at breaking the workaday world into groups. Some are promoted by Peter Principle and will generally fail -some not. Some just do the same thing for 30yrs for the paycheck and blindly and obediently do only what is ask of them with mediocrity. Some are Alpha Dogs (2 types)...those that do anything to succeed (competitive by hook or crook) and those that are wily with discernment, street smarts and some brains to succeed. Then there are those that are creative, learners, doers that work hard at their own improvement and knowledge base throughout their lives and try to help others along the way. There are probably other groups but those are the primary, IMHO.

The last group is probably why I joined this great forum. The people here come from all walks, disciplines, and skills, but share freely their ideas, builds and have that creativity and fortitude to get things done with the things at hand and with or with out plans. I would like to consider myself one of that last group but know I've fallen from the tree a few times until I either realized it myself or it was pointed out to me by someone that got the point across, nicely or not.

How 25 yrs qualifies as an argument escapes me; not seeking expertise of others part of that, continually; we'd be but a self proclaimed expert. Invalid, self absorbed, and not even well-rounded.

TM51 aptly noted that d2 doesn't seek expertise of others and would probably fall into the Alpha Dog 1 category in my book based on the story. Years ago an old guy I looked up to and thought was an expert once told me not to call him that. He told me to break down the word...Ex (has been) Spurt (a drip that's about to)...I got it and never forgot it. I had the privilege over the years to work with and learn from some fine people with what I would call wisdom. Not all of them were old, some set in their ways a bit (focused) but the ones I am grateful to have known are those that had vision, learners and the wherewithal to get it done, the best they could, share it...and most of them had broad backgrounds, young or old. Honestly to me its the miles not the years that really mean anything, but only if we learn from them, share them, and take them to the next level. Otherwise it's just road weary miles no matter what archetype we fall into.

Lord knows I have run into my share of "Them" that irritate, cheat, lie, steal and tell me "What to do or How to Behave". I'm a big fan of bumper stickers over the years and billboards too. What I've noticed over the last 20 or so is that more and more are telling people how to behave. Like the "CoEXist" stickers out here that you see on the back of the ID10T's that just cut you off in traffic or races you off the line to get in front of you and be a digital driver (on/off the gas and brakes) in front of you...Control freaks or maybe just ID10T's, IMHO. Who knows but they are here. What ever happened to the wholesome fun of the Burma Shave signs? Personally it's feeling more like a Systemic Pathology that is growing in the work world as well as the rest of it.

So how does one make do in a sea of "them" and "Why we do what we do"? Franks story of his encounter with MR39 and TM51's with D1 & D2 illustrate how it can be done and I've used both methods over the years. I think what I've learned from all those incidents is that I learn also from them, and sometimes figure out how to approach it better next time. However there are those times that nothing seems to work better than a good Gibb's, Head Slap. I got a few knots on my head a time or two from my Dad OCS ring...and it usually worked although I didn't like the method much and told him so a few times as I got older. It's funny we talked about it a year or two before his passing and I was able to laugh and tell him I actually appreciated some of them...and he said to me that he had learned a lot too by me telling him it was too harsh sometimes.

As for "Why we do what we do", I think it has to do with loving what we do or did, with pure intentions to do it right and the best of our ability, learning along the way...sometimes making something from nothing, recycling old stuff, making something better because we can and because deep down we like doing the impossible and doing the Right Thing. Not something I want to wear as a badge but as a way of becoming for myself.

Probably reaching the 5K point here and wondering if I'm in up to my ears... ~PJ

[Toolmaker51]

PJs concern with a MR25 or d3 label is...groundless.
d1, d2 and likely MR39 are NOT here or even lurk reading posts. They certainly aren't posting. And no recall of an ''outside the box'' moment.
Jon may have a magic screening process. Or 'they' collectively may have nothing to relate. I hope for both.

[Frank S]

Speaking for my encounter for several years after my little tiff that day after I had moved on and started out on my own MR 39 who had been in his mid 60's at the time often came over to my house to hire me to make something for him. We were at the time of the tiff and until his passing about 20 years later quite good friends. He was just one of those guys who had started with a company at it's beginning and found that he had no skill set or desire to venture into other departments. It wasn't until I had hired in there that he started thinking he would become an Alpha dog type 1. he could not accept that some young guy who by his thinking couldn't have more than a year or 2 experience in any single field. It was a near impossibility in his mind that including my 6 years in the military I could have 14 years under my belt, while if truth be told those 14 years would translate to more like 30 or 35 years (wage slave years that is) . Heck I held a 6 g confined space certification and could make hot ties on live Nat gas pipelines when I was 16 yet here he was nearly 65 having worked in the same department his whole career doing the same thing over and over
I would have went off the deep end after a week of what he did his whole life
During the times he would come over for a visit , sometimes a few adult beverages might be consumed if we were just socializing and not actually constructing something for him, he once said that he thought that I might be savant at many things.
Who knows maybe I was at one time now in my later years I find that things which at one tie ware second nature to me require much more due diligence and thought before I attempt to design or make them.